Contributed by Jake R.

As much as I kept saying I wanted to date, I didn’t feel very motivated. The idea of going through the process of talking to people seemed like too much work. Then I decided to either quit talking about wanting to date or get started.  I chose to get busy dating, keeping it light and fun.  This is how I did it.

I got off the couch. Yes. It’s that simple; I stopped being a couch potato and made dates with friends.  I found that starting there was a lot of fun, even effortless, and provided me with a new view of the whole dating thing.

I got back to entertaining.  I enjoy having people over but I had stopped doing that for some reason. So, I set a date for a dinner party with a couple of close friends and asked them to bring someone new. I found it was so easy to talk to and get to know this person in the comfort of my home. We ended up having a great time and I’ve begun entertaining more often as a result.

I stopped comparing myself to others. I have a friend who goes out on lots of dates so, thinking that I needed to be more like him, I asked him for advice. What works for him is volume dating but, since I am a serial monogamist, I don’t want lots of random dates. I decided that rather than doing it his way, I would date my way. After all, I have been to lots of parties and know how to have fun. I only needed to be myself.

I got out of my comfort zone. I heard about a singles event and decided I would go.  This is not something I’d ever done before so I was a little intimidated at first. However, after a little while, I started talking to people there and found there were many things I had in common with them. I actually enjoyed it and I might even go to other singles events.

In the process, I’ve met several new people and my circle of friends has expanded. Also, dating is no longer a chore and is actually much easier than I had thought. The key for me was to take the pressure off and make dating fun!

How do you motivate yourself to get out there and date?