Contributed by Noreen Sumpter, Personal Life Coach


Confidence is a characteristic that people recognize immediately. Personal Confidence is something you have. On a whole, it is a way of being.  The first question that one should ask oneself is: Do I feel confident? If so in what areas of my life do I feel confident? If you feel your confidence is missing, what areas of your life is it missing from?  How can I develop my confidence?

The idea that confidence is missing is neither bad nor wrong, it is just missing. Confidence might not be missing throughout your life, but it might be missing in some areas of your life.  So the idea would be to look and see where and how a lack of confidence impacts your life.  Do you feel a sense of anxiety?  Do certain situations make you feel insecure? Do you feel stuck in your career?  Do you not feel confident dating? These are some of the areas where confidence could be missing.

Missing confidence in one’s life or in areas of one’s life can quite possibly evoke all kinds of feelings that lead us to make unhealthy choices. When this occurs, you might behave in ways that do not work for you or the people around you might feel unsafe with you and feel damaged in your space.

Confidence is something that is important in all aspect of one’s life.  It is important to have a healthy dose of confidence so that you can live your life comfortably and happily.  Confidence helps you connect to people in ways that open you up to say what you want, and allows you to share yourself and create feelings of connection.

Five signs that you are lacking confidence are as follows:

  • Not being present in the present moment
  • Not being responsible
  • Not having personal boundaries
  • Not having an authentic sense of self-value
  • Not asking for what you want authentically and with integrity

Confidence could be missing in these areas/circumstances:  career, relationships, after a divorce, emotional loss – after losing something or someone important or a personal experience that mattered in one’s life.

Some people see confidence as a sign of control.  They think the tougher, reserved, remote, forceful and well-dressed they are, the more confident they will appear.  They think that the more distant they are the more confident they will be.  They feel that they have arrived economically, they have a great job, they speak well, and they have all the physical amenities in life such as the car, home, money etc. They feel that their confidence or lack of it can steamroll over people they consider lesser value.

Understanding the power that having Personal Confidence provides, open doors and enables you to create the life you want. However, when one is not clear that confidence comes through a development of oneself, the lack of confidence creates a harsh experience for you and the people around you.

“Confidence is a characteristic that people recognize immediately; it is a way of being, you either have it or you don’t, but it is often apparent on first meeting.  A person with confidence is like a ray of sunshine on a really gray day. Confidence … thrives on honesty, on honor, on the sacredness of obligations, on faithful protection and on unselfish performance. Without them it cannot live.” Franklin D. Roosevelt


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Noreen Sumpter, Personal Life Coach works with High Achievers who feel trapped in their private life.  They lack personal confidence and self-esteem. By helping them clear mental clutter and dissolve limiting beliefs, they can take deliberate steps, own their voice, speak their truth and have the freedom to live life their way.  “Live Life Your Way” 

   “Live Life Your Way”

To make an appointment with me, please call 718-834-9450 or e-mail

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