Contributed by Noreen Sumpter, Personal Life Coach
This week’s question is from Mary H. – “I feel like I hate myself. There is a part of me that is always putting myself down. How can I learn to love myself?”
You know you’re a Hater, just admit you hate on everything about yourself. You hate on others who reflect the things you hate about yourself, whether they are successful or not. You haters are everywhere. You hate on yourself and you destroy your dreams, by saying things like: ‘It’s too hard.’ ‘I don’t have enough time.’ ‘I don’t have the money.’ You’re a hater and some of you are lazy haters. You use your hate to sabotage yourself and make yourself wrong. Get real, you know you do. As a personal life coach working in Brooklyn, I work with people all over the nation. I also have clients in France and England. Hating is not a national practice, it is a universal practice. As a hater, you are always looking for things to hate on yourself about. You’ve worked really hard to build your confidence and self-esteem only to smash it across the rocks. How long you’ll sit on the rocks is entirely up to you.
Being a hater impacts your world from the inside out, eroding your confidence and self-esteem. This has you point the perpetual finger at another person or thing, instead of being responsible for your actions. Haters hate themselves, that is what they do.
In order to avoid haters, it is important for you to look inside yourself and realize that you are the one true hater. You are the saboteur; you are the killer of your dreams and ideas. You’re the one that does not keep your word to yourself or others. You are the one that is constantly in fear, hiding your greatness. Many of you believe that the hater is external, when in fact the hater is with you 100% of the time. The big truth is it’s internal.
Babe, you’re the one that hurts you, fills you up with feelings of rejection, no one can reject you ever. Rejection is rejection when you see it as so. Someone says something and you get mentally interrupted, pull yourself off course and hurt yourself. Rejection is not what you think it is. A person that is committed to their dream goes out looking for the ‘no’s because they know it brings them closer to their dream. Some see it as failure. There is no such thing as failure. Thomas J. Watson is attributed with saying “If you want to succeed, double your failure rate.” There is no such thing as rejection, and no one ever fails. No man, woman or child on this planet can reject you. You reject you and you deem yourself as failure. People can say what they say, but you are the only person that can take that feeling in and hurt your own feelings. You have the power and the strength to recognize your own pain or the pain that you inflict on yourself.
If there is an image or idea that you are not happy with in yourself recreate it. Stop deceiving yourself. Create another truth or reality, then make your own truth of who you are by not seeing yourself as the victim. You are an incredible human being. Every time you refuse to accept and acknowledge your power, beauty, truth or wisdom, you’re making yourself a victim. When you are riding the waves of your own self-pity or are feeling depressed; start by working on recognizing that you’re lying to yourself and not coming from your personal truth. When you lie to yourself, you carry that feeling around with you and it is replayed back to you in the world by the energy that you are transmitting. Know that energy begets energy. Believe this, your world begins with your thoughts and words. You are not a target of some universal lotto that selected your name to be a victim in some universal drama. It’s your own personal drama that you created.
An example is when you traverse, (I like the word traverse) the world thinking you are ‘ugly’, ‘fat’, ‘stupid’, ‘not enough’, then you will begin to set up the resonance in your energy field that you are all those things, the result of this is you will now attract people and events that mirror your thoughts. You will begin to hear, see and experience those thoughts all around you. Wah! As you begin to clean up that energy and shift it to being ‘attractive’, ‘smart’ (you can learn) and ‘enough’, the universe will begin to reflect back at you. You have recreated and now this becomes your truth. Whatever you believe be it negative or positive, that is your word and that is what you have now created in your world.
Practice holding in your mind and heart a higher vision of yourself, releasing all those things that are negative and shut you down. Replace them with positive thoughts that open up your heart. The experience might be scary at first and feel uncomfortable, but the more you practice, like any skill, the better you will become. Your world will become light, bright and you will be happier. When you begin to generate higher thoughts about yourself that you are beautiful, powerful and you have enough of what you need, you will see those thoughts reflected back at you. You will see and experience abundance in your world.
Consequently, there is no such thing as a hater. Remember the hater is really you turned in on yourself.
- Write a description of your life as you see it and as it is today.
- Find two or more qualities that you do not like about yourself and recreate them into something that you do like.
- Then create an action that you would like to take to and generate a positive experience.
- Finally, dissolve by sharing it with people you love.
Do you have a question for Nourishing Nibbles, please send it to:
Noreen Sumpter, Personal Life Coach: works with High Achievers who feel trapped in their private life. They lack personal confidence and self-esteem. By helping them clear mental clutter and dissolve limiting beliefs, they can take deliberate steps, own their voice, speak their truth and have the freedom to live life their way. “Live Life Your Way”
“Live Life Your Way” www.noreensumptercoach.com
To make an appointment with me, please call 718-834-9450 or e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org