Contributed by Noreen Sumpter, Personal Life Coach
especially if a man wants to have oral sex with me. I do not feel pretty down there, but I want to gain more confidence. What can I do? ~ Betsey F.
A: Look at yourself!
To have a healthy, happy and secure way of life, it is important to know your physical, mental and emotional self. To have a sexually pleasurable life, it is important to pay attention to your physical self and know what it looks and feels like. Have you ever looked at your Vagina in a looking glass (Mirror)? If the answer is no then it is time to get to know that exceptional you. Not metaphorically but realistically, using a looking glass.
From this day forward, it is important to start the practice of making your pussy and yourself right. Making yourself right is one of the most powerful tools. If you make yourself right, no one can ever make you wrong, at least not with your agreement. It gives you confidence and charisma. There will be a level of comfort in your way of being that will become transparent to the entire world. People will know that you are confident, secure and happy.
Well, get yourself a good mirror not one of those itsy bitsy ones. A good mirror preferably the kind that makes your vagina look incredible and large. Magnified mirrors are even better. I can hear it already, all the negative comments. Some of you will feel like hating on your pussy, some of you will make your pussy wrong. Ladies stop that now, and find the need to appreciate your pussy.
It takes practice to learn to give up making yourself wrong. Here is your exercise.
- Take the hand mirror and look at first your face, every detail of it. Study your face for 15 whole minutes; use a timer if you have one. Cell phones usually have timers.
- As you’re studying your face watch and listen for the thoughts that are racing through your mind about your perfect face.
When your 15 minutes are up, step two in the process begins.
- Take the same hand mirror, sit on a comfortable surface and place the mirror between your legs after removing your undergarments and study your vagina for 5 minutes.
- As you’re studying your vagina and marveling in its uniqueness, look at the contours, the color and study the thoughts that are now racing through your mind about your perfectly beautifully crafted Vagina. Your Vagina is so unique, do you know there is no other Vagina in the world that looks like yours. By now your vagina will be responding to the attention that it is receiving. It will moisten and be in reaction to the attention. Notice your thoughts about your Vagina.
- Notice how many of them are negative.
- Notice how many of them are positive.
I suggest that you look at you vagina in the mirror regularly and become very familiar with it. You will see colors, shapes, textures and you’ll find pleasure in yourself. It is important that you learn to see beauty in your own body and mind, no matter what size you are. No one can teach you how to find pleasure in yourself and your life, that is an inside job and you have to learn that on your own.
In order to engage in great sex and self appreciation, it is important that you know what you would like sexually, as well as what you desire or would like in the world. If you do, you will be comfortable with your sexuality and you will free yourself up to have great life. The more you are aware of yourself and your body, the more confident you’ll become in your entire life. You’ll have your sexual boundaries intact and you’ll know what works for you and what does not. You will know how to satisfy yourself and your partner. You will begin to live in a world of no regrets as you will become comfortable with your choices and actions in the world.
You’ll take full responsibility for your pleasure. People will enjoy being with you because they will not have to read your mind; you’ll exude confidence and self esteem. You will no longer be that stray pussy/vagina begging for attention because you’ll be happy and secure in all areas of your life. There’ll be no room for complaints in any department of your life, you will educate yourself about your desires and you will be happy and content in your entire life.
Sexual and life dissatisfaction is not something that women who are responsible for themselves experience often. They will experience the intimacy they desire, and the life they deserve.
If you feel that it’s another’s responsibility to provide you with an orgasm or to provide you with a life that “just happens,” then you will be upset and dissatisfied until you learn differently. A confident woman with self esteem gives great directions because she knows what she desires. You can learn how to get your life and needs met in a way that you will derive pleasure from and remain individually responsible for your own needs and mindfully co-creating with another.
So, my request of you is to use that looking glass (Mirror) and get to know your pussy/vagina to create possibilities of learning what you would like in your life. Be confident with strong self esteem and know what you desire and create a life to get your personal desires.
Do you have a question for Nourishing Nibbles, please send it to:
Noreen Sumpter, Personal Life Coach: works with High Achievers who feel trapped in their private life. They lack personal confidence and self-esteem. By helping them clear mental clutter and dissolve limiting beliefs, they can take deliberate steps, own their voice, speak their truth and have the freedom to live life their way. “Live Life Your Way”
“Live Life Your Way” www.noreensumptercoach.com
To make an appointment with me, please call 718-834-9450 or e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org